Adventures in Nap Land

I’d like you to meet my driver. Oops. Did I say my driver? I meant my husband. I’d like you to meet my husband. It’s an easy mistake to make. If we’re going anywhere, he’s generally driving. And he’s pretty good at it. At least I think he is. I’m usually asleep when he drives, so I could be wrong.

I’m a good driver too. At least I am when I’m awake, which is one of the things you look for in a good driver.

Unfortunately, I’m a bit of an insomniac, and for some reason, I sleep almost as well in a moving car as I do in a bed. I’m even tempted to wake my husband on particularly bad nights, and hand him the car keys. I never do though; that would be mean. Besides I sleep better when I know my driver is well rested.

So he drives; I sleep. This arrangement works well for us. If he disagrees he’s never said so, at least not while I was awake.

Not all couples are so lucky. Nothing shines a light on the differences in a relationship like a road trip does. And for some, it starts before they even get in the car. “Why are you bringing all this junk? We’re going on vacation, not moving.”

Still later, when he/she asks innocently for a pen or a stick of gum, the other will say sarcastically, “We don’t have one. You didn’t think we had room for it.”

Among traveling companions, there’s often one who wants to record every cent spent on the trip and one who will give them plenty to record. “Oh, come on. We’re on vacation.”

“That doesn’t mean we should spend fifteen bucks for a hot dog!”

Often one partner wants—even needs—to make and stick to a schedule. It’s no coincidence that nature has given these individuals the stamina to go all day without food, water or restroom breaks. The other cares nothing for schedules and prefers to…uh…go with the flow, so to speak.

In many couples, there’s one partner who prefers to do most of the driving and one who feels the need to tell them how to do it.

For others there are button battles and dial disputes, a difference of opinion about what constitutes good traveling music and how high it must be turned up to be enjoyed.

Despite all of this, road trips are a glorious time to bond, relax and make memories. It could even be said that the differences between traveling companions actually make travel more interesting—if only in the retelling. If nothing else, they help the travelers look forward to and savor the return home that much more.

And I didn’t mean to imply earlier that I have no differences with my own traveling companion on life’s highway.

For one thing, he can go days without eating. I have to eat every few hours or I can’t sleep.

Plus I believe that if the speed limit is 65, we should go 64—in case the speedometer is wrong. And he thinks that if the speed limit is 65, we should go 75—in case the speedometer is wrong.

We have completely different internal thermostats too. He’s always in hot water for blasting the air conditioner too high and I get the cold shoulder every time I turn it back down. If our car didn’t have bun warmers, we might never go anywhere together.

He insists on taking photos of me at every landmark, memorial, and scenic overlook we come across. This makes me a little cranky, especially if he woke me up to get the photo. Consequently, all our vacation photos give the impression that he didn’t go on the trip and I didn’t enjoy it all that much.

But I love a road trip with my husband much more than my photos would lead you to believe. We’ve had many wonderful adventures together, though you may be thinking if I sleep everywhere we go, how adventurous can it be?

Point taken. I admit I once took a nice long nap somewhere in Missouri. When I woke up, my husband asked me if I’d seen the lake. I asked, “What lake?” Turns out we’d passed by the Lake of the Ozarks which covers 54,000 acres and has 1,150 miles of shoreline. In my defense, I don’t think we drove by the whole thing. But you’d have to ask my driver to be sure.

Dorothy Rosby is the author of ’Tis the Season to Feel Inadequate; Holidays, Special Occasions and Other Times Our Celebrations Get Out of Hand and other books. Contact her at www.dorothyrosby.com/contact.